I was planning to make my first post of 2021 a nice, compact mini-article about the New Year and my writing hopes and goals. Then I started thinking about us humans.
In an effort to began embracing the random spontaneity that makes for (what I hope is) more relatable and thought-provoking writing, I just want to talk about humans for a minute.
We are pretty complex creatures. When we aren’t hungry, we are full. When we are alone, we want others. But when we are with others, we want to be alone. I find myself with millions of thoughts going through my mind almost every other minute, in an effort to better understand myself to then better understand others.
I wish I could say my effort has been fruitful. But alas, I think my takeaway is that life is made of contradictions, which my perfectionistic, going-with-one-end-of-the-spectrum-or-the-other self despises.
It is quite the balancing act to juggle a variety of opposing thoughts and feelings all in one day. But that is in our nature (well, at least in mine); we are meant to evolve, change, and grow from what we thought were all constants. Nothing is constant, nothing is set in stone. Yet, isn’t that what we are all ultimately searching for? Structure, stability, and a set stone?
We want that job that isn’t a complete chore in order to achieve and maintain a stable income, we want a family to come home to and foster as our home. For the longest time, that has been my mission – to solidify what was a puddle of mess and make concrete the inconcreatble (yup, new word but I’m sure you know what I mean).
It makes each and everyday exhausting yet full of some promise that you will get everything right. Until you DO get the structure and stability…that makes you want to crawl out of your skin. You then crave nuance, adventure, a bit of danger to test your limits. It’s a balancing act for sure. But no point in arguing with human nature. We humans are complex and that’s what makes us evolve, change and grow.